999 and 682

Addendum SCP-999-B
The following is a report from an experiment in which SCP-682 is exposed to SCP-999 in the hopes that it will curb the creature’s omnicidal rage.

SCP-999 is released into SCP-682’s containment area. SCP-999 immediately slithers towards SCP-682.

999:  (elated gurgles)

682:  (unintelligible groans, growling) What is that?

SCP-999 moves in front of SCP-682, jumping up and down in a dog-like manner while calling out in a high-pitched squealing noise.

682:  (groans) Disgusting…

SCP-682 immediately steps on SCP-999, completely flattening SCP-999. Observers were about to abort the experiment when SCP-682 started talking again.

682:  (grunts) Hmmm? (unintelligible) what is this… (low noise, similar to light chuckle) I feel… good…

SCP-999 can be seen crawling up from between SCP-682’s toes, up along its side and around its neck, where it clings on and begins gently nuzzling with its pseudopod. A wide grin slowly spreads across SCP-682’s face.

682:  (deep chuckling) Feel… so… happy. Happy… (laughs) happy… happy…

SCP-682 repeats the word “happy” for several minutes, laughing occasionally before escalating into nonstop laughter. As laughter continues, SCP-682 rolls around on its back, slamming its tail upon the floor with dangerous force.

682:  (bellowing laughter) Stop! No tickling! (continues laughing)

SCP-682 and SCP-999 continue the “tickle fight” until SCP-682 finally wears down and appears to fall asleep with what would appear to be a smile on its face. After fifteen minutes with no activity, two D-Class personnel enter the room to retrieve SCP-999. When SCP-999 is removed, SCP-682 immediately wakes up and unleashes an unidentifiable wave of energy from its body, all the while laughing maniacally.

All persons within the wave’s range collapse into crippling fits of laughter, allowing SCP-682 to escape and slaughter all in its path. Meanwhile, SCP-999 quickly rescues as many persons as it can, taking them to a safe place to recover from SCP-682’s "laughter wave" while agents suppress and re-contain SCP-682.

Despite the tragedy that SCP-682 had brought upon the facility, SCP-999 has not shown any fear towards the creature and in fact has made gestures suggesting it wants to “play” with SCP-682 again. SCP-682, however, has stated, “That feculent little [unintelligible] can [DATA EXPUNGED] and die."

Memo from Dr. ████: “While the test was unsuccessful and ended in tragedy, that had to be the funniest thing I have ever seen. I never thought I’d see the day when I would regard SCP-682 as “cute”. Please send me a copy of the security tapes ASAP.”